I was not baptized Catholic. I am an only child. My parents are divorced. I grew up in sunny Southern California.

All five of my children have been baptized Catholic, thanks be to God. I have been married for over 10 years and could not imagine life without my wife. I happily live in Connecticut where the virtues of the “seasons” are extolled and winter driving can threaten your life.

There is no explanation for the foregoing save that of God’s infinite mercy and personal love in my life.

Despite being baptized in a Protestant church, I attended Catholic school and became Catholic when I was in about fourth grade, right around the time my home life was really falling apart. The sisters at my school really helped my mom and me out. I proceeded to attend an all-boys Catholic high school and had a tremendous experience of camaraderie, saw a few truly noble examples of manhood, and knew one really holy and memorable priest. I was not well formed, but had enough exposure to the Sacraments that the idea of God was never far away and some seeds were certainly planted.

I went to Williams because I wanted to play as much college baseball as I could at the best possible school. I went to Holy Mass just about every Sunday and to Confession rarely. Thankfully, I have always had a very strong conscience which pulled me toward the Church. Early in my college career, I was not a very active member of the Catholic community—I might attend Mass and sit in the back. I may have even attended the odd Rosary, even though I don’t remember praying one before going to Williams.

Over time, I suppose that I gravitated towards a circle of friends and there happened to be an extraordinary group of people at the Newman Center on campus. They were friendly, smart, welcoming, kind and serious. Despite my enthusiasm for the weight room and athletic fields—I ended up getting to play college football, also—which did not wane during college, I fit in better with these kids than any other group. Like I said, I have always had a substantial conscience and I think part of that is being introspective and, like many college students, seeking the truth. I wanted to find out what life was all about and what I really believed.

Newman gave me the opportunity to be around brilliant kids who loved Jesus and whose faith was built on a truly reasonable foundation. The path for the rest of my life was being shaped by the considerable formation I was undertaking at Williams. I learned a ton about my faith and none of it happened in a classroom. Tremendous priests came to hear confessions. I went on a retreat. Missionaries from the Fellowship of Catholic University Students came and led Bible studies. I learned about John 6.

Before I knew it, I was whipping footballs around the Newman Center basement with my friends, hitching a 45 minute ride to spiritual direction in Stockbridge and going to the March for Life in DC. I was not totally squared away and I am still acutely aware of my many shortcomings and need for God’s grace every day. However, I was building a relationship with God in the Sacraments. In doing so, I was keeping the stream of His grace alive. I was moving forward and making spiritual progress, no matter how gradual.

In the fall of my junior year, I met the most beautiful girl on campus and can remember walking up to her in football shorts and a cowboy hat as she was representing the student pro-life group at the Purple Key Fair. With the help of a couple mutual friends who also happened to hang out in the Newman Center, our courtship took off. In addition to being gorgeous and brilliant, she was a senior and eventually I had to watch her graduate. She started a great job in Washington, D.C., and we kept dating long distance. I had a blast, remained totally in love and prayed over and over that it would be God’s will that I marry her.

I graduated June 5, 2005. We were engaged June 17, 2005. We were married September 9, 2006.

I think I discerned my vocation by choosing to take steps forward in my spiritual life. With the help of good people and holy priests, I became a well formed Catholic capable of making big decisions. I developed a sacramental life that let me tap into God’s grace which gives its recipients confidence that they are on the right path and not alone as they are under the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

Looking back, what was most important in preparing for my vocation and post-College life was the Sacraments. I would say, start with Sunday Mass and monthly confession. Don’t miss it and, if you do, don’t give up. If you persevere, I will bet your life changes and you end up going a lot more often.

Second, adopt some of the spirituality of St. Francis. Namely, try as hard as you can to live in the present moment and simply do the next right thing. Don’t put a lot of pressure on yourself with respect to your vocation. No two lives are the same. Some people become priests or nuns and some people become moms or dads and some people are single forever. Some people find their vocation really young and some people don’t. It is all fine as long as we are all becoming holy. But when God smacks you across the head with a two-by-four and gives you your vocation on a platter like He did to me, then don’t delay, and run as fast as you can to seal the deal. Do it even if it makes your parents unhappy and people think you’re too young or that you’re giving up your future or any other reason. They may love you, but God loves you more than you know.

Finally, reading Mere Christianity and Letters to a Young Catholic early in my journey changed my life. I read Brideshead Revisited a bit later, and it was one of the most beautiful books I have ever read. Today’s Communion Antiphon was along the lines of, “He who ponders the statutes of God night and day will bear fruit in due season.” What we think about and dream about has a tremendous impact on the direction of our lives. Love God and be holy.

JTM ’05